The news from Pakistan just keeps depressing day by day. I was only still recovering from the news that a pregnant woman was stoned to death in broad day light in front of Lahore HIgh Court, by her own father when this shocker has arrived. Apparently the dead woman's husband had murdered his first wife because he loved the second woman so much. May Allah have mercy on the souls of both these women.
Don't know what's worse, a father stoning her pregnant daughter, or husband strangulating wife because he loves another woman. How far low we can fall from this? Istead of accepting his own weakness of faith and total absence of a moral conscious the husband person comes out and indirectly blames his dead second wife for being the reason he killed his first wife. I don't even want to say anything about the father, except hat I hope he regrets and repents from his sin before Allah takes him to task. May Allah swt guide and forgive these men. But these and countless other horror stories of violence against women in the Muslim world are now becoming too frequent and too grotesque to ignore or dismiss as mere aberrations.
We can no longer turn a blind eye to the fact that violence against women is an epidemic of deadly proportions across the Muslim world, through no fault of Islam, which is why it is even more disgraceful and condemnable. We come from a faith where the Prophet never hit a woman in his life, denounced female infanticide and till his last days, kept advising the men, to take care of their woman and be kind and gentle to them. Yet today, men, and unfortunately even women, in many Muslims societies think it is man's right to sanction and discipline women.
This misplaced understanding of faith has created an attitude where men consider it their right to use force at any whim and created an adverse environment in which many women silently suffer abuse without having any means to protect themselves. Sometimes even silently suffering is portrayed as being rewarding in the eyes of Allah. This couldn't be further from the truth. Deliberately putting your self in harm's way, and not doing what you can do to fight for your rights is by no means Islamic and does not earn you any blessings.
Its not just with regards to violence against women, but even generally speaking, societal attitudes towards men who are benevolent towards women are highly negative. A man who consults with his wife before making decisions is a "joru ko ghulam". Increasingly, practices and behaviors which are actually closer to Sunnah are considered "unmanly" (such as helping out with domestic chores). What ought to be considered gentlemanly behavior, is rejected and instead unconditional servitude and abuse is accepted, promoted and even demanded as male privilege. None of this has any basis in Islam whose sets of rights and responsibilities for men and women are based on justice and each gender's unique characteristics.
No doubt women every where in the Ummah will be answerable to Allah for the sins they have done and many times we do slack of from some our responsibilities, but abuse and violence is not the answer. In fact, majority of the victims of abuse have done nothing to deserve such cruelty and in most cases they are meted out these punishments for asking for rights that Allah swt has rightly bestowed them with. Because of male abuse of their rights, the vast majority of women every where in the Muslim world are in seriously disadvantaged social position, denied even the most fundamental rights that Allah swt has bestowed them with, and men are the culprit. There is no running away from this fact. Men have forgotten that just because they may be physically stronger it does not give them the right to do whatever they want. If you can do nothing else, at least let us live with dignity and honor and stop putting us a bait to satisfy your ego. Fear Allah!
I don't know how or when men will stop using religion to justify their loss of self-control. Islam in no ways sanctions violence against women.There is no dignity or honor in disrespecting or abusing women and resort to such means is not a sign of male strength but weakness. If you are a real man, you will never hit a woman.
My heart aches every time I read or think about these two women. One was stoned to death by her own father in Lahore for the crime of choosing to marry out of her own will, a right that Islam grants her, and the other was murdered by the very man Allah swt entrusted with the responsibility to protect and guard her. They will stand before Allah on the Day of Judgement and seek justice from the men who have wronged them. May Allah swt elevate their ranks in Paradise.
In the meantime, each one of us has a responsibility to condemn this, and to try and do whatever we can do prevent these injustices from happening so repeatedly. The least we can do is play our part in changing societal attitudes toward violence against women by correcting the misunderstandings that even many seemingly educated people have about religion sanctioning violence against women.
Don't know what's worse, a father stoning her pregnant daughter, or husband strangulating wife because he loves another woman. How far low we can fall from this? Istead of accepting his own weakness of faith and total absence of a moral conscious the husband person comes out and indirectly blames his dead second wife for being the reason he killed his first wife. I don't even want to say anything about the father, except hat I hope he regrets and repents from his sin before Allah takes him to task. May Allah swt guide and forgive these men. But these and countless other horror stories of violence against women in the Muslim world are now becoming too frequent and too grotesque to ignore or dismiss as mere aberrations.
We can no longer turn a blind eye to the fact that violence against women is an epidemic of deadly proportions across the Muslim world, through no fault of Islam, which is why it is even more disgraceful and condemnable. We come from a faith where the Prophet never hit a woman in his life, denounced female infanticide and till his last days, kept advising the men, to take care of their woman and be kind and gentle to them. Yet today, men, and unfortunately even women, in many Muslims societies think it is man's right to sanction and discipline women.
This misplaced understanding of faith has created an attitude where men consider it their right to use force at any whim and created an adverse environment in which many women silently suffer abuse without having any means to protect themselves. Sometimes even silently suffering is portrayed as being rewarding in the eyes of Allah. This couldn't be further from the truth. Deliberately putting your self in harm's way, and not doing what you can do to fight for your rights is by no means Islamic and does not earn you any blessings.
Its not just with regards to violence against women, but even generally speaking, societal attitudes towards men who are benevolent towards women are highly negative. A man who consults with his wife before making decisions is a "joru ko ghulam". Increasingly, practices and behaviors which are actually closer to Sunnah are considered "unmanly" (such as helping out with domestic chores). What ought to be considered gentlemanly behavior, is rejected and instead unconditional servitude and abuse is accepted, promoted and even demanded as male privilege. None of this has any basis in Islam whose sets of rights and responsibilities for men and women are based on justice and each gender's unique characteristics.
No doubt women every where in the Ummah will be answerable to Allah for the sins they have done and many times we do slack of from some our responsibilities, but abuse and violence is not the answer. In fact, majority of the victims of abuse have done nothing to deserve such cruelty and in most cases they are meted out these punishments for asking for rights that Allah swt has rightly bestowed them with. Because of male abuse of their rights, the vast majority of women every where in the Muslim world are in seriously disadvantaged social position, denied even the most fundamental rights that Allah swt has bestowed them with, and men are the culprit. There is no running away from this fact. Men have forgotten that just because they may be physically stronger it does not give them the right to do whatever they want. If you can do nothing else, at least let us live with dignity and honor and stop putting us a bait to satisfy your ego. Fear Allah!
I don't know how or when men will stop using religion to justify their loss of self-control. Islam in no ways sanctions violence against women.There is no dignity or honor in disrespecting or abusing women and resort to such means is not a sign of male strength but weakness. If you are a real man, you will never hit a woman.
My heart aches every time I read or think about these two women. One was stoned to death by her own father in Lahore for the crime of choosing to marry out of her own will, a right that Islam grants her, and the other was murdered by the very man Allah swt entrusted with the responsibility to protect and guard her. They will stand before Allah on the Day of Judgement and seek justice from the men who have wronged them. May Allah swt elevate their ranks in Paradise.
In the meantime, each one of us has a responsibility to condemn this, and to try and do whatever we can do prevent these injustices from happening so repeatedly. The least we can do is play our part in changing societal attitudes toward violence against women by correcting the misunderstandings that even many seemingly educated people have about religion sanctioning violence against women.
